My husband says I tend to over extend myself from time to time. I have no idea what he’s talking about (wink wink).
He says I get caught up and volunteer for things and then get frazzled and cranky when I get too busy. I lovingly disagree.
Do you know your limits?
Contrary to what my husband says, I do know my limits. On the rare occasion that I spin a few more plates than I should, I’m able to recognize fairly quickly whether or not I can keep spinning them all or if one needs to drop!!
When you know your limits, you avoid a lot of stress and headaches before they even happen.
In some cases, it can take time for us to know ourselves well enough to even recognize that we have limits.
When I was younger, I thought I had to do everything. Be Super Woman. Super Mom. Be everything to everyone. Sound familiar?
Despite what my husband says, I can say No confidently.
I know that life will go on if I don’t volunteer for one more thing. Not every meal has to be cooked from scratch. My house doesn’t have to spotless. I’m not a perfect mom. There are only so many hours in the day.
Which is why I schedule one day a week, where I don’t leave the house. It really helps me to stay calm and catch up. No makeup doesn’t hurt my feelings either.
Usually, by the time you realize that you have limits, you’re already so stressed that you can’t see straight.
Here the 5 ways to know your limits and decide if something new is right for you:
Does it speak to your heart? We are not all called to be missionaries or work with children. That’s ok. We all have our gifts. One of the things I love to do is bring a meal to a family when they are in need. It’s a small thing, but I love doing this for people. My hope is, if I ever have surgery or go thru a difficult time, someone would be kind enough to bring food to my family. After bringing a meal to a family recently, a light bulb came on for me. Did you know there are places where you can call and they make food and all you have to do is pay them? Who knew? Now, most of the time, when a family is in need I call a local restaurant, place an order, pick up 2 meals (one for them and one for our family) and BOOM. It’s done. No stress and no mess for me.
Honestly, the family doesn’t really care what you bring them, they are just touched that you thought enough to go thru the trouble.
If it’s something you feel lead to do or God is speaking to you, listen. There is usually more than one way to answer that calling without losing your sanity. Choose the one that’s right for you.
Does it challenge you? Some people want to run in the Boston Marathon. Some people want to go back to school later in life and get a degree. Some of us just want to find the time to read an entire book from cover to cover. Everyone challenges themselves differently.
If it’s a good challenge and you can make it work in your schedule, do it. You may be better for it in the end.
Will it be “short term”? Most of us can do just about anything if we know it’s only for a season. It won’t last forever. If there’s “light at the end of the tunnel”, it makes it easier to tough it out and do something that will benefit you or your family.
Will it keep you from more important obligations? Occasionally, opportunities or decisions present themselves and you have to ask yourself if this is the right time. It may be something you really want to do but NOT RIGHT NOW. It might even be a great job. Sometimes there other things going on in our lives that make this new thing “not the right fit, right now.”
Remind yourself that No doesn’t always mean Never. Sometimes No means, Not Now.
What’s your “Why”? If you say yes, will it make you happy (does it speak to your heart?) or will it only make someone else happy and you miserable? Is it for the greater good (like a family obligation) or are you simply “people pleasing”?
When you know your limits, you are better prepared for most anything that comes your way and can say Yes or No without making yourself crazy in the process.
You might also enjoy Be Proud and Confident in Your 40’s.